A few days ago I stuck-foot-in-mouth. Actually, that’s too kind. I lost it and I wasn’t very nice. No, actually I was mean and ugly and I yelled and said things I could cut my tongue out for! I was tired and in pain – That is not an excuse, just part of the circumstances that led to my horrid behavior.
I’m solid proof that no matter your age or circumstance you can throw an ugly fit. So, empty nesters and middle aged divas, retirees, grandmas and pas – this is for you too. I know, you thought when you read the first paragraph that this was for teenagers. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
I lay awake in the middle of the night praying to the Lord and wondering how to make things right and I can’t. Only God can make all things right. He can turn a pathetic situation into a joyous celebration. He can bring restoration. He can renew my tongue. He forgives because He loves.
He will again have compassion on us; He will tread our iniquities under foot. Yes, You will cast all their sins Into the depths of the sea. Micah 7:19
I lashed out at someone I love more than life itself. Why do people do stupid things like that? Why do we hurt those we love the most? And where does contentment fall into this mess because my contented heart isn’t? My heart is in turmoil. I feel like my soul is being tossed around in a raging storm.
I feel stupid and I need to totally forgive myself as the Lord has forgiven me. Holding on to the sting of asinine behavior makes me realize just how much I need Him, my Savior, in my life and that there is no contentment without Him.
It also reminds me of how far I need to go before I learn to be content in all things, in all circumstances . Even when tired. Even when in pain. It also reminds me that biting your tongue can be a good thing at times.
You shot high in the sky, then the bottom dropped out; your hearts were stuck in your throats. You were spun like a top, you reeled like a drunk, you didn’t know which end was up. Then you called out to God in your desperate condition; he got you out in the nick of time. He quieted the wind down to a whisper, put a muzzle on all the big waves. And you were so glad when the storm died down, and he led you safely back to harbor. So thank God for his marvelous love, for his miracle mercy to the children he loves. Psalm 107: 24-31
Contentment in the inwards parts doesn’t mean there aren’t going to be some storms to battle along the way. A person can live a life of spiritual contentment, serenity and tranquility only with the Lord at the helm.
I am thankful and grateful that the person lovingly forgave me and I pray that the Good Lord erase the horrid memory from their mind. I am so thankful for a loving and forgiving God.
Oh, and I am giving up unkindness for Lent
Have a wonderful day.
Be sure to check out my other post in my Contentment Series